Which is worse?
A. The pathetic, potty-mouthed morons of BB who are unable to sustain logical thought?
or
B. The pathetic, fork-fumbling morons of Hells' Kitchen who are unable to fry bacon?
A. A mammogram, wherein a comparative stranger in latex gloves manhandles your boobs one-by-one then squishes them between cold metal plates while saying "This may pinch a bit."
or
B. A gynological exam, wherein a comparative stranger in latex gloves sticks a chilled speculum up your vagina, cranks 'er wide and then says "Hmmmm."
A. Neighbours you don't like who let their golden retreivers run amok through your yard?
or
B. Total strangers who walk their dog (on a leash!) through your property like it's a public park or something?
A. Spilling hot coffee on your keyboard?
or
B. Spilling just a bit of nailpolish remover?
(I know the answer to this one!)
A. A loud fart on a crowded escalator?
or
B. A silent fart at a table for two?
Also? Feel free to add your own current which is worse favorite.
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8 comments:
1. Hell's kitchen morons.
I expect the BB peeps to be morons.
2. Gyno.
One is just a lie that you KNOW is a lie, the other is cause for stress becaue you don't know.
3. Strangers with dog on leash.
Human's should have a sense of decency. Dogs lick their balls, thus my expectation is low.
4. Coffee & keyboard
Unless the little bit of nail polish remover is on a prominent, important piece of furniture (*flashbacks of me at age 10*)
5. Loud fart.
If I'm at a table for two, it's probably with someone I'm not afraid to say "excuse me, sorry" to.
1. BB, only because I don't watch HK.
2. I'll say a mammogram. I've never had one (yet) but paps don't bother me at all. Is that TMI, lol?
3. Both inexcusably rude.
4. I'd think the coffee. ??
5. Farting is just bad, no matter what. *makes icky face*
My Answers:
B. Hell's Kitchen. I cannot imagine eating in a restaurant where one of these fools has been allowed near my food.
B. I still remember my first gyne exam. The doctor was one of those pasty, pale-faced Irishmen with a florrid complexion. This sounds like a contradiction - but there are lots of people named McWhatever who look like that.
I was maybe 20 years old? Doc said "hmmmmm...", did my Pap, then whipped the speculum out, bammed 3 fingers up my hoo-ha, gropped around for a minute then said "You will never get pregnant because your uterus is tipped." Then he took his gloves off and left.
I'm like, 'What!?!?!!?"
B. Even though they annoy me I am free to go yell at the Goldens, wave a stick, throw a pinecone - whatever. I have not yet done this to the perky little blonde who walks her little white terrier thing on a leash. But I'm building up to it.
B. Nailpolish remover. Wrecks everything it touches.
A. This actually happened to me on one of those long, mall atrium escalators. I was not the farter; I was the fartee.
Woman up ahead of me let out one of those long, drawn-out, machine-gun farts. (She could have taken out a whole platoon with all the bullets she released!) And I am stuck on the escalator behind her, knowing that I am about to take a measured ride through a stranger's ass gas. Which was a very unpleasant prospect. It's a small world after all...
LMAO! Oh god, I'm so sorry...about all of it! I'm not laughing...I'm not laughing...I'm not laugh *snort*!
*Shudders*
*thinks of pretty flowers*
1. I don't even watch HK, but I have no use for someone who can't fry bacon.
2. Gyno exam.
3. Neighbors.
4. Probably nailpolish remover. Although if it didn't kill the keyboard, I might enjoy the smell.
5. A loud fart.
1. Definitely the Hells' Kitchen group. This is supposed to be what they do best and they fail miserably.
2. Definitely the gyno. I would rather expose my boobies than my hoohah.
3. I would say the loose dog because he'll just crap and run off whereas the majority of peeps who walk their dogs on a leash pick up the crap. You should post some "no trespassing" signs on your property. Or "private property".
4. I don't know what is worse but I'll go with the nail polish remover.
5. Definitely the silent one at a table for two.
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